Confession: "My new partner wants a child but I don’t want more kids”

Loading player...
Finding love as a single parent is fantastic! But what happens when your new partner has a baby-shaped hole in their heart and yours is firmly filled with independence? This is the dilemma facing Sarah, a 28-year-old mom whose boyfriend yearns for fatherhood. Sarah has poured her heart into raising her son and now, with him in Grade 5, she's finally found a sense of freedom. However, her boyfriend's desire for a child has been pressuring her, pushing Sarah towards drastic solutions like secretly getting her tubes tied. Sarah sent Stacey and J Sbu the following:
"I am a 28-year-old single mother of one who I had when I was very young, and I’m done with having more kids. My son is in grade 5 now, and we live a good life. My boyfriend (35) has no children, and he is desperate to have a child. I don’t want to have any more children, as I finally have the freedom that comes with having older children. I am feeling the pressure of him wanting a child, and since I’m set on not having more, I suggested he get someone else pregnant, we maintain our relationship because I love him, but I’m not willing to sacrifice myself or my life for this need. I am even thinking of tying my tubes without him knowing."
This situation requires open communication and maybe the option of finding a middle ground. Maybe they could explore fostering a child? Ultimately, the key is respecting each other's desires. Building a future together means compromise, but not self-sacrifice. While we’re no experts in this realm, we do believe that if their dreams of parenthood remain miles apart, a tough decision might be necessary.
27 Mar 2024 English South Africa Society & Culture · Personal Journals

Other recent episodes

Your Big Walk playlist that means something

As we build up to the Suncoast East Coast Radio Big Walk, we’re creating more than just a moment on the Durban Promenade, we’re creating a shared soundtrack to it. I think we can all agree that music has a way of carrying us through, whether it’s that final stretch…
19 Mar 7 min

Who are you walking with and who are you definitely not walking with?

For the Kiddies Hotline this week, we’re tying it into the spirit of the Suncoast East Coast Radio Big Walk. We want to know… who are you walking with and who are you definitely not walking with? Are you teaming up with your bestie, your mom, your dad, maybe even…
18 Mar 1 min

Whose shoes are you walking in and how has it changed you?

There’s something powerful about this year’s theme for the Suncoast East Coast Radio Big Walk, Walking In Your Shoes, because it’s not just about the physical act of walking; it’s about perspective. It’s about pausing for a moment and asking yourself: whose life would I better understand if I walked…
17 Mar 10 min

Gone then back: A daughter's struggle with a deadbeat dad

A father who vanished for years has suddenly slid back into his child's DMs and no, it was not to apologise, not to reconnect, but to ask for money. This week's confessor had to take their own dad to court just to get help with varsity fees and even then…
12 Mar 10 min

Ziya Mohanlall : A cricket prodigy at just 14 years old

if you needed a reminder that the future of South African cricket is looking incredibly bright, this next story will do exactly that. At just 14 years old, a Durban Girls’ College learner is already making serious waves on the cricket field. Ziya Mohanlall, who’s only in Grade 9, has…
12 Mar 5 min